nama om visnu-padaya krsna-presthaya bhu-tale srimate bhaktivedanta-swamin iti namani namas te sarasvate deve gaura-vani-pracrine nivisesa-sunyavadi-pascatya-desa-tarine Dear Srila Prabhupada Please accept my obeisances at your lotus feet. Thank you for saving me form the miserable hopeless life I was leading before you preached to me and forced me to come to Krishna consciousness under your expert guidance. Although you convinced me of everything through your books, still I am sure it would have been very difficult to come to Krishna consciousness without the association of the devotees. You created the International Society for Krishna Consciousness for exactly this purpose. To enable the fallen conditioned souls to go somewhere and get the association of some pure devotees and by this association become pure devotees themselves by following the perfect and scientific process of Bhakti-yoga, Krishna consciousness you have taught. Your vision is not a group of congregational members meeting once a year on your appearance day, it was not even that of a group of Hindus meeting at the ISKCON temple every Sunday... Your vision is a Krishna conscious society in which the whole world can live. You want us to live in your international society for Krishna consciousness 24 hours a day seven days a week and 365 days a year simply serving Krishna, you and the other devotees also. You also want us to serve humanity at large by giving them the most valuable thing, the real purpose of the human form of life -- Krishna consciousness. You want us to rise every morning before 4:00 am and attend Mangal Aroti, worship Srimati Tulsi Devi, chant at least 16 rounds of: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare on our beads and unlimited rounds off the beads while we are engaged in service. You want us to hear and speak the Srimad Bhagavatam in the assocation of devotees, you want us to sit down and honor the Lords prasadam together. You know there will be differences of opinion, disagreements on philosophical points, ect. But still you don't want us to leave the assocation of devotees you have created. We have to decide to serve you and Krishna with all our energy -- mind, body and activities... That is your mission... Today there is lots of talk about "Nama Hatta"... Practising Krishna consciousness in your own home... So I wondered what you thought about this so I searched the infobase and there is no record of you ever saying the word "Nama Hatta"... And from what I have heard from you were very keen to establish communities of devotees living together strictly following the regulative principles, chanting Hare Krishna, distributing your books, going out to chant Hare Krishna on the streets and distributing prasadam to the people in general... This is your mission and by your mercy I have become a little attached to serving you and living in the association of devotees, serving the devotees, serving the Deities, distributing books and going out on Hari Nama sankirtana... However, to my great pain, I am not allowed to do these things in your organisation, "ISKCON", which is now managed by people with a completely different idea. They throw me [and everyone else who dares to take shelter of you without going through one of their non-liberated gurus...] out, threaten violence and sometimes also beat us up only because we have accepted you as our spiritual master... So what can we do? Recently a leader of ISKCON in the UK, Siva Rama Swami, has informed me I will never be able to stay in ISKCON unless I give up my "imaginary" relationship with you... I tried to tell him I have a real relationship with you... But he wouldn't hear of such a thing... Later he said that giving you up alone wouldn't be enough to live in ISKCON... I'd also have to take initiation from one of the "gurus" who even they admit are not liberated souls... So the bound can't rescue the bound... Only a liberated soul can rescue us and you are the liberated soul, the Paramahamsa Thakura who has rescued me. Of course there may be some other liberated souls around... Who knows? BUT THEY HAVEN'T RESCUED ME!!! YOU HAVE RESCUED ME... So I don't know what is your plan... The ISKCON temples are becoming more and more like Hindu churches with no sign of any real love or devotion. Most of the "devotees" are on the payroll now so it is a completely different mood... And I don't like that mood... We went to Bhaktivedanta Manor (London) yesterday (Janmastami) and I noticed you were frowning... So I don't think you like the idea that your "servants" are driving out anyone who wants to worship you because they want the worship for themselves... Anyhow Siva Rama Swami's boys throw me out after ten minutes or so. It is rather ironic. Last time they threw me out [from Soho Street] and said I should live outside and visit the temple regularly... But when I visit the temple they throw me out... So it is a very sad situation... I just want to live in the association of the devotees, chant Hare Krishna, distribute your books, go on Hari-Nama, and worship you and the Deities you have kindly brought to the Western world... Anyhow please engage me in your service. I can never do anything to repay the debt I have to you but it is my desire to use this body and the bodies I will take for thousands of births to come to serve you... And in every birth I will fight the demons who say I can't have any relationship with you... that I have to give up my "imaginary" relationship with you... cakhu-dan dilo jei, janme janme prabhu sei divya-jnan hrde prokasito prema-bhakti jaha hoite, avidya vinasa jate vede gay jahara carito "He opens my darkened eyes and fills my heart with transcendental knowledge. He is my lord BIRTH AFTER BIRTH. From him ecstatic prema emanates; by him ignorance s destroyed. The vedic scriptures sing of his character." Your aspiring servant Madhudvisa dasa PARAM VIJAYA SRI KRSNA SANKIRTANA!!!